Open hands

Plans; Projections; Attention to detail; Things to do list – we gain a sense of satisfaction carefully planning every step, dotting every ‘i’ and crossing every ‘t’.  BUT what if our perfect plan crumbles in this broken world of uncertainty?
As I watched the 40ft lorry leave for its journey to Romania on Friday, (my husband following the next day), I thought “another journey” but then life is a journey at any age:  forty; fifty; sixty or nearing our three score years and ten?  How quickly the years pass – one moment and life is gone.  This morning my heart was melted as I reminded myself of the faithfulness of God, how undeserving I am of such love, such friendship. Acceptance of this change has made me  realise that as a garden needs tending, watering – so did I. My head was drooping under the emotion of pain and suffering I encountered. I needed to be watered, but this change of direction is not retirement; it is a new beginning.  He has brought me ‘safe thus far.‘ How precious those words are to me ‘thus far‘.  My heart is no longer mine. In total surrender to His perfect plan and timing, I want to love those who journey day by day bowed down with brokenness.  ‘I know the plans I have for you …’   ‘Lord, kindle the light of your fire of love, slowly, in small steps of faith.  Deut: 7: 9 ‘Know therefore that the Lord your God, He is God, the faithful God …’ C. H. Spurgeon wrote: ‘Faith goes up the stairs that love has built and looks out the windows which hope has opened.’                       
The faithfulness of God is as fresh as the air we breathe.  It is easy for me each morning to ‘switch’ on the central heating, to relax in the comfort of a loving home. I have food enough, clothes …… but then these things are a normal part of living ?  Do I  remember to count my blessings; to consider that the things I take for granted are not so for everyone? My eyes must be open to see, my ears open to listen, my heart open not just to live for myself but thoughtfully for others.
I am so blessed, so thankful to the Lord for those who have thoughtfully given to this recent project. The hours of dedication and involvement in the lives of people they will never meet yet cared enough to give from a heart of love. Guided by the unseen footprints of our silent companion whose guidance in all decisions causes us to understand life from His perspective.  Our every day choices teach us to love as He loves.  The forgotten of Cighid, the unloved, unwanted orphans, Casa Grace Foundation, Emanuel Hospice and Iochebed in Suceava.  Thank you to EVERYONE who made this JOURNEY OF HOPE a reality.  There is no substitute for service, to serve together with an undivided heart as Unto Him.
Small tokens of His faithfulness:   This morning my husband is hosting another International Conference in Emanuel University.  The Letters to Timothy and Titus have already been translated into Romanian and given as a gift to all Romanian Pastors.  New every morning …… a request this morning,  ‘Dr Moore we hear a Hungarian translation is soon to be released, please can we have a translation in the Russian language?’.  How can we grasp the mind of the one who created us?  The depth, breadth, height, width of His plan of action in His time and placement.  Knowing the heart of God is so important, becoming aware of where we are in His plan, recognising that ‘As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher that your ways …‘ Isa 55: 9.
Deep in thought this morning I found myself scanning the horizon, the mountains, the sky. The wonder of God’s Perfect Plan of Creation overwhelmed me.  I often come before the Lord with special requests yet go away pondering, thinking in my mind will I succeed; will that happen?  ‘Come Unto Me‘, outstretched hands offering to carry our burdens, words of rest, of comfort.  The many jewels I treasure in my beloved Romania come to mind. I ask you to prayerfully remember Denisa, her heart is filled with anxiety these days, please pray for her.  David, the young son of my friend Dorena (called home last summer) needs our loving and prayerful concern for his condition just now.  The number of patients requiring palliative care increases.  Eight patients between the ages of  35 – 45; a very special grace required for Julianna (37) who has a baby of six months (Adam). Her cancer has progressed aggressively during the past four months affecting her gallbladder/liver with recent development of total metastases. She is now in the terminal stages.  Who will care?  Who will go? Dami (15) diagnosed with leukaemia. He commenced chemotherapy, but lately he was not feeling well and remained in ICU for a few days. Pray for him and his family! Robi, (18) diagnosed with leukaemia at the age of 13. He has relapsed and recommenced chemotherapy. At present his immune system is very low, his chemotherapy cannot continue. He will require a Bone Marrow Transplant in Italy. Victor (2) an adorable little boy!. He is in a foster family and has been diagnosed with leukaemia. His foster mum takes care of him and stays with him in hospital. She has a son the same age as little Victor. All these children are helped through the feeding programme as well!  ‘Come Unto Me’
C,H. Spurgeon wrote:
‘No stars gleam as brightly as those which glisten in the polar sky. No water tastes so sweet as that which springs amid the desert sand. And no faith is so precious as that which lives and triumphs through adversity. Tested faith brings experience. You would never have believed your own weakness had you not needed to pass through trials. And you would never have known God’s strength had His strength not been needed to carry you through.‘

 ‘If we could see beyond today as God can see’,  ……’  A beautiful hymn, yet how many of us know the true meaning of the last refrain? ‘We cannot see what lies before, and so we cling to Him the more’. 

I found it difficult to watch my husband leave alone for Romania, in what seemed a longer mission trip.  Waiting, remaining behind again?  But these days draw us nearer to His presence, assuring us that ultimately the One who controls all our delays is holding us in Higher Hands.  As I closed the door of B5, the silence was deafening, someone was missing!  My thoughts turned immediately to those for whom this is normal.  We question circumstances, situations  without realising that these can be precious days of proving the extent of His love for us through our personal relationship with Him.  ‘Have you entered the storehouse of the snow, or have you seen the storehouses of the hail, which I have reserved for the time of trouble, for the day of battle and war?’ Job 38: 22-23.  A storehouse filled with resources, reserves sufficient for each day – where instead of questioning, His overshadowing presence calms our hearts, our longing, our quietness.  John Henry Jowett wrote ‘God comforts us not to make us comfortable but to make us comforters’.  May we always make time for others.

 ‘If we could see beyond today as God can see’,  ……’  A beautiful hymn, yet how many of us know the true meaning of the last refrain? ‘We cannot see what lies before, and so we cling to Him the more’. 

I found it difficult to watch my husband leave alone for Romania, in what seemed a longer mission trip.  Waiting, remaining behind again?  But these days draw us nearer to His presence, assuring us that ultimately the One who controls all our delays is holding us in Higher Hands.  As I closed the door of B5, the silence was deafening, someone was missing!  My thoughts turned immediately to those for whom this is normal.  We question circumstances, situations  without realising that these can be precious days of proving the extent of His love for us through our personal relationship with Him.  ‘Have you entered the storehouse of the snow, or have you seen the storehouses of the hail, which I have reserved for the time of trouble, for the day of battle and war?’ Job 38: 22-23.  A storehouse filled with resources, reserves sufficient for each day – where instead of questioning, His overshadowing presence calms our hearts, our longing, our quietness.  John Henry Jowett wrote ‘God comforts us not to make us comfortable but to make us comforters’.  May we always make time for others.

(Hebrews 12: 27)
 Is this really the final day of February? Where have the days gone? The tiny snowdrop amazes me as it  persistently pushes through the hard and frosty soil. So delicate yet determined even though a struggle to make it through.  A reminder of the cold and frosty winter surrounding many I love in the land of my adoption – Romania.  Each day a struggle; unloved, forgotten, acceptance of who or where they are; their true value as an individual, a person. My heart yearns to comfort the suffering, to tell them of the great love my Lord has to offer. He is the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort. May they clasp their hand in His.
Yes, I am still ‘By the Brook’ – questioning in the secret corner of my heart ‘what am I accomplishing?’ What a faithful God have I, no mistakes in God’s timetable. While my heart is in Romania, I am here and here for a reason.   My service is not restricted to time or placement – the call of my heart remains unchanged.  To do what the Lord is telling me to do and to serve where He also leads. The heartbeat of mission is doing as God instructs in His time and plan – the choice is not mine.
February has blown winds of unimaginable pain and suffering. A few days ago, I thought my heart would break in two as I received continuous emails, spoke with Daria, Estera, Monika. ‘The cry of the broken.’  Every situation different with one underlying factor of extreme pain and loss.  Psalm 91: 1 assures us that ‘He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest …’ I have found myself reading this Psalm over and over.   ‘Shirley, is this where you are resting today?’  Possessions can be removed, change is evident but our hope remains in the ‘Things That Cannot Be Shaken.’ We know they will remain. Pray for our ministry, our outreach, that we may point precious souls to the foot of the Cross. Pray with me each day as I list the prayer points for you to write upon your heart.
Sister L (Pentecostal) age 20. On 14^th February this precious Sister was cooking food on the furnace. She placed the pot on the ground and went to fetch the lid, when she returned her little boy of 22 months had fallen into the pot.  An emergency team concluded the burns to be 60% covering his entire body. The little one died.  The pain of loss and separation is personal and real. Thank the Lord we were able to assist with funeral costs. Please remember Gabi and the team of Iochebed, every day they face pain and suffering, we stand with them in provision of medicines for babies, critical needs, heart rendering situations. Let us continue to show the love and compassion of our Faithful God.
Estera (Emanuel Hospice Social Worker) is in daily contact with me as she knows my heart and the love for ‘My Children.’  Little Deborah (3) also lost her battle. Her young mother gave birth the following day after she passed away.  The funeral was five days ago. Emanuel (15) was buried the day before. I am so thankful for the opportunity of knowing the parents and loving these precious jewels who were sent to us for such a short time.  Thank you for your heart in providing food for these families. Your heart of compassion has fed the hungry and dying until their final days.
Little Kevin is stable; Ishmael (6) will have to wait for his 20^th surgery as this cannot take place just now. We rejoice that Ishmael’s father has come to know the Lord and is being baptised in April. This is the true fruit of our labour.  To God Be The Glory! Dada (4) is receiving chemotherapy just now, we wait on results regarding a possible Bone Marrow Transplant.  Her smile remains unchanged – she is adorable.
Denisa wrote to me (I quote): ‘Last month was difficult. After chemotherapy my blood values were very low. I received transfusions of platelets and blood each week but still unable to receive treatment until the values of blood grow.’ Denisa is an inspiration, displaying such courage and determination, please remember this very special young lady whom I have grown to love.
 Daria (Emanuel Hospice Psychologist) telephoned last week updating me on the various patients I know and love. Pray for Daria as she offers bereavement care to the many grieving children who have recently lost a father or mother.  No one can comprehend the inner pain of loss, yet it is clear in their searching eyes as they try to tell you ‘I am fine.’ Please remember Chisty, Carla, Alex, Raul, Luis, Larisa – all different children with one common factor – ‘the pain of loss.’
Sister Elena has recommenced chemotherapy, at present she has a severe infection due to low blood count.
 Sister Nela is trying to regain her mobility after many months of being bed bound.  Her desire is to walk again.
 
 New patients to add to your prayer list:
 ‘A’ a gentleman of  (48) – advanced brain tumour, paralysed and unable to communicate. Pray for his wife and their little adopted daughter (4). His time is short.
 ‘M’  a lady of (48) suffering from breast cancer and recently diagnosed with multiple bone metastases. She is a widow and her son has just commenced university. Pray for assurance in this situation where they feel all is hopeless.
 ‘L’  a lady of (47) dying from gallbladder cancer. Pray she will open her heart to the message of salvation before it is too late.
 People need the Lord; pray for Daria and Estera as they offer counselling, care, food but more importantly as they share the Gospel of the Lord Jesus to these precious people.
 We rejoice with Lajos (husband of my friend Bobby).  A few days before Bobby died, she wrote a letter to her beloved husband and placed it in the Bible we had bought for her during her latter stages. Lajos found the Bible containing the letter and through reading verses underlined, came to know the Lord. He began attending Emanuel Baptist Church and was baptised a few weeks ago. This is the core meaning of our service.  We should never pass by –  we should stop, tell them the old, old story of Jesus and His love.
 Monika (Director, Casa Grace) continues to see God at work as she embraces the sorrow, hurt and disappointment of the desperately poor, the unwanted orphan, disabled child, abandoned baby. At some point in each of our lives, we face trouble, we cannot escape it, it is part of every day living. We have the joy of belonging to the ‘Family of God’ of placing  our fears and sorrow into Higher Hands. Pray for Monika in her role as she encounters the hurt found in the streets of Romania.
 The family of Emese need our love and support. Two beautiful little girls trying to reason ‘Why my Mummy?‘
 My little Adam whose time in hospital seems to be more frequent now, the staff in the abandoned baby wing mourning little Adrian who although nine, his tiny multiple malformed body was wrecked with continuous pain – his cot is now empty – the pain of loss.
 Sister Anna from a Roma village, widowed and four children – awaiting surgery.
 And of course ‘Our Beloved Dora’ loved by so many and who prays for ‘Sister Shirley’ every day that ‘soon she will come back with lots of presents for me.’
We embrace the needs of heartache, pain and suffering. My husband will leave next week for Romania taking much needed resources for the second quarter ending 30 June, 2018.  Pray for Dr. Moore as he visits  those in despair.  We may question, not fully grasp or understand why but we must pour out our heart in trust knowing that in our ‘Dwelling Place’ here is rest, shelter in the comfort of the heart that was broken for us. The threads of our tapestry may be tangled, perhaps broken but in the words of a ‘Golden Oldie.’
 Someday the silver cord will break,
And I no more as now shall sing;
But oh, the joy when I shall wake
Within the palace of the King.
And I shall see Him face to face
And tell the story – Saved by grace.
May this be the core of our mission to tell the story ‘Saved By Grace.’
Shirley
 
 
 
 

‘Sensitive;  Thoughtful;  Loving;  Kind; Tender Hearted; Caring…’ 
Words can be meaningful but are they filled with compassion, comfort?  Are they similar to those spoken by ‘The Good Samaritan’? He did not simply ‘pass by’. He took time, his eyes were opened and he saw and spoke ‘words of compassion’. We live in a world filled with uncertainty, pain, yet the words we speak can define our true character of who we are within. Do we see;  Do we Care; Are we willing to open our heart to feel and share in the pain and suffering placed before us?

This morning in my own private time with the Lord I read ‘Bless the Lord, O my soul; And all that is within me, bless His holy name!  Bless the Lord, O my soul, And forget not all His benefits’ (Psalm 103: 1-2)  The words that touched me ‘And forget not all His benefits’.  How could I ever forget the beautiful words of Jesus filled with meaning .  Words.  Loving Words!
 Today my co-workers have been in touch, alerting me to the reality of the day, the list of critical illness is growing.  They need us to stand beside them in prayer.  I am heart broken, I feel helpless, far removed from those I love in their time of pain and suffering. Yet my heart is not removed, it is filled with compassion as I feel their suffering and gladly walk beside them. My attitude, my response must display the character, the nature of my Lord who displayed His love by giving His all. Who is my neighbour?
I smile as I remember my visits with Estera to Emanuel and Dada. Their childlike faith shining through in the hope of a ‘future’, a ‘new tomorrow’. Both Emanuel (15) and Andrada (4) suffer from Leukaemia. Da Da (as many of you will recall) was moved to a hospital in Timisoara. Disappointment followed as a suitable donor was not in place for her transplant  to proceed. Then she fell and broke her arm – the procedure was postponed. Today, it was confirmed she is not able to have the transplant because cancer cells continue to be active in her body. They are trying an alternative treatment with the view of  a future transplant. If this is not a possibility, Da Da will return home.
Emanuel (15) a quiet and shy boy, has undergone a Bone Marrow Transplant in Timisora; his condition is critical, he will be discharged with a palliative care package in place. 
Little Salome was thrilled to receive a Disney Frozen Bag. Her brother Alex is very sick – he had a car accident and has incurred a severe brain injury. He is unable to walk or speak. 
There are many other precious jewels who are very sick in hospital, too sick to return home. They smile gently when receiving the gift of a little handbag. ‘He gathers the lambs in His arms and carries them close to His heart….. Isaiah 40: 11. 
My friend Elizabeth in the care of Emanuel Hospice; her husband John suffered a severe fall and is unable to walk.  Who will care for Elizabeth now ? 
I refer to my recent ‘blog’ ‘I KNOW THE PLANS I HAVE FOR YOU’ and ask you to continue to remember:
The children who have lost parents recently, the family of Brother Joseph, The husband and children of my friend Sister Emese ‘Called Home’ last week.; The family of Baby Florin. He is close to the broken hearted.
Sister(s) Elena; Alina; Magdalena; Anna; Denisa; Dora – each with their own individual and specific need.
I recall asking myself the question (in hospital) ‘Am I doing enough?’  For some time the Lord placed the work of Iochebed in Suceava (12 hours drive from Oradea) on my heart. This week, Tell Romania felt exercised to send a donation by Swift Payment.  I share the response received a few hours ago: Sister Alexandra (23) married with four children (aged 5; 4; 2; 2 months) living in severe poverty, the children in poor health due to lack of food and low immune system.  No heat.  Sister Gaby’s (Director of Iochebed) heart of compassion was moved to see, to feel and to do. With the donation, a stove/furnace has been purchased and sent as a ‘Gift from the Lord’ to this family. The provision of heat for the little ones, cooking facilities (when food is available).  This dear young sister wept tears of happiness and praised the Lord that we did not pass by but stopped to show we cared.
We can walk through the storms of life and the winds of adversity because we know that Heaven and Earth will pass away, but His words will never pass away.  Our confidence, our trust is in the Living Word.
Lord, Give me faith for the things that are ‘real’. 
Shirley, 01 February, 2018
 
 

‘Still my soul be still
And do not fear
Though winds of change may rage tomorrow
God is at your side
No longer dread
The fires of unexpected sorrow 
God, You are my God
And I will trust in You and not be shaken
Lord of peace renew
A steadfast spirit within me
To rest in You alone’.
(Words and Music by Keith & Kristyn Getty & Stuart Townend)
 Every breath I breathe is precious, a gift given by my Heavenly Father.  This thought has impacted me during this period where circumstances caused me to know the true meaning of ‘Trust’.  Placing my trust in a heart beating constantly with love.  As I waken each morning, methinks ‘Today is yesterday’s tomorrow’. Yes, a change of plans and suddenly,  yet in the change I came to know the importance of today, moving by faith into the next step of another tomorrow. Fear and faith are not compatible, yet I had to go through a period of fear as I faced overwhelming circumstances of the reality ‘why not me’? When all things appear to be against you, one has time to reflect.  Embarking from the plane in Stanstead Airport and ‘rushing’, suddenly chest pain.  I silently tried to breathe deeply and kept walking. Five weeks into our mission trip although I knew things were not right, I had an unshakable peace.  I knew I must return for further investigation.  What has the new me learned?  God is faithful. His delays are timely as we face the realisation there is still work to be accomplished. My heart has found rest that although ‘By the Brook’ for a season, in the quiet hours His voice, His peace has removed my disappointment, discouragement, turning my fear, hopelessness into a new dimension of focus.  As a child I often heard my Mother sing ‘Many things about tomorrow, I don’t seem to understand, but I know who holds tomorrow, and I know He holds my hand’.  He has stirred the waters refreshing my soul and assuring me He will equip me with strength for each new day (and tomorrow),  His work will be accomplished ‘For Such A Time As This’. ‘The Lord will guide you continually, And satisfy your soul in drought, And strengthen your bones; You shall be like a watered garden, And like a spring of water, whose waters do not fail’. Isaiah: 58: 11
Charles Stanley lists some requirements for faith:  Listening to God; Obeying God; Depending on God and Waiting on God.  And so in faith, the project for CIGHID will go forward.  Fifty Adult Orphans need to know they are not forgotten. They need to know and feel loved. Details listed on our Website.
We read in Luke 10: 42 ‘One thing is needed, and Mary has chosen that good part ……. ‘  What treasures we find sitting at the feet of Jesus. ‘Break Thou the Bread of Life oh Lord to me‘.  We give thanks to the Lord for His faithfulness enabling us to Follow Our Heart in 2018; we must love unconditionally, providing bread for the hungry and dying this incoming year.  During the first ten days of January, nine Hospice Patients died.  Darling Baby Florin lost his battle with Leukaemia and only a few days ago a much loved brother so kind and gentle, Brother Jospeh, received his call to Glory.  I remember my last visit two days before I returned home, he asked:  ‘Sister Shirley, will I be going home soon’?  Joseph is finally home. Moments ago I learned from Estera,  ‘Little Ella’s’ father has died. So important to have met their personal needs but more importantly to point them ‘By the way of the Cross’.  The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh, blessed be the name of the Lord.  I ask myself: ‘How many are the lost that I have lifted, how many of the chained I have helped to free, I wonder have done for my best for Jesus, the One who did so much for me?’
I am home for a season, yet not home.  The Lord is my dwelling place and there I rest. The work and financial support continues. Monika, Dora (Casa Grace), Marinela, Daria, Estera (Emanuel Hospice) are in daily contact with me updating me on current situations.  How precious the bond of friendship.  In the plan and will of God we will meet mid April. I have felt the prayers of the Family of God, humbled by the numerous tokens and expressions of genuine care and love.  Pastor David McFarland has been my ‘Balm in Gilead’.
I find my hope renewed with each new sunrise, mercies sufficient for each day.  His unfailing love is continuous and my hope is in Him alone. Let us go forward together offering hope to those in despair.  As I finish, I end by quoting the words of Charles Stanley: ‘Give me a heart to seek You above all else, Lord, I want to experience Your presence on an intimate level’.
‘I have set the Lord always before me’. (Psalm 16: 8) What need I more ?

August 2016 was the last time Carla (Lorena’s Mum) heard her little girl speak or saw her play in the remote village of Mihai Bravo. Her beautiful dark eyes now dull with pain as she lies day after day unable to

communicate. The only sounds heard are those of pain and suffering.

Lorena was in my heart all day yesterday, the freezing conditions in Romania,

Minus 15. My heart ached and I longed to be near her, just to hold her close.

In Jer 2: 2 we read ‘I Remember You’ reminding me that I am always in His

thoughts. Again as I read in Psa 68: 10 ‘Thou, O God, hast prepared of Thy

goodness for the poor’. How our Lord loves and so must I with complete

confidence in the Sovereign Goodness of God. Last evening before retiring,

I received the attached pictures from Estera; tears filled my eyes as I saw

Lorena’s smile. What a Faithful God we serve, answering my prayer and

stilling my heart. You created this smile through your Gift of Love. ‘You gave

a cup of water and a bite of bread too’. Thank you.

Andrada (4) (affectionately known as Dada) was diagnosed with cancer 2 years ago. Then, aged only 2, this

little darling faced many treatments of chemotherapy. Yesterday her

mother received the news her little one has relapsed and she is devastated.

Andrada needs to start chemotherapy as soon as possible but her family have

no money to pay for the treatment. They are a very poor family who live in a

village 40km from Oradea. She will require two rounds of chemo (each one

costing 2,000 Euros). But they cannot afford or raise this vast sum of money.

The people from the village are seeking to support this family but further

urgent help is required. The doctor expressed Andrada has a good chance of

survival, although a Bone Marrow Transplant would need to take place in

Timisoara during March. These are only two of many!

As I launch ‘GIVE WITH YOUR HEART’ Appeal to run throughout 2017, my ordinary faith needs to become

extraordinary, trusting the Lord, knowing that He alone will support it, increasing my faith moment by

moment, day by day as I depend on Him. It is not about money or asking for money, it is sharing the

passion, the desire of Tell Romania to provide the urgent needs: Monthly Food Provision; Medicines;

Finance for Medical Treatments/Scans. But more importantly to share the hope of the Gospel. I ask that

you stand with us that God may be glorified and the faith of His children be strengthened. The Orphan

without father, mother; the Disabled, weak in mind and body; the Abandoned, crying out just to be loved;

the hungry and dying… We can be instrumental in bestowing blessing to those who have no one to care.

Why are so many of God’s people poor, sick? Not mine to question, I must trust knowing that the Lord has

infallibly foreknown every one of them and is aware of all the needs of His

poor children. I treasure in my heart the words of our Lord: ‘You are poor and

needy, but He has thought of you’. £1,000 is our aim each month to enable

£500 to be forwarded to Emanuel Hospice and £500 to Casa Grace

Foundation to provide food for the poverty stricken families within their care.

Every Home Crusade kindly printed A3 laminated posters for the use of

churches, groups, individuals who wish to organise a specific event. If you feel

the Lord directing you please contact us:

Tell Romania, B5 Ocean Green, Ocean Drive, Portstewart, Co. Londonderry,

BT57RU.

LOVE INCARNATE, LOVE DIVINE, CAPTIVATE THIS HEART OF MINE, TILL ALL I DO, SPEAKS OF YOU.

Shirley, January 10, 2017